Saturday 15 May 2010

I could seriously cry

Just woke up about half an hr ago to a run of ectopic/out of sync/irregular beats for about half an hr (just calmed down)......cannot believe these fucking things are back! yeah I am swearing...for the first time on my blog! I am SO pissed off...I ain't had any of these damn things since Jan and then they come....its like \i get rid of it and some evil bitch posts it back to me......... i don't mind the odd flutter through the day...that really don't bother me...... but when it gets into that rhythm of miss beat miss beat......you just think it will never ever go back..... i don't want this ...i want it to go .......... i will work on it peeps!....after what i have achieved this yr i cant let it get hold of me again!

Wednesday 12 May 2010

BLOODY back again!!!!!


Hi peeps...... well I have been having an amazin time..... gettin out and about... to say I was agoraphobic a few months ago .. u would think I was lyin... I am also walkin more.... the palps did go...it was an amaziin feelin to feel normal and not worry about doin anything....but the other day they came back....but you know what .......truth.......and I think you will believe me you know.......I REALLY DONT CARE..... let them....for now i dont give a shiney shite ... let em happen....they will go ,,, i have had months and months with out them.... so im sure they will go again....it aint gonna stop me gettin out like before..... it just prooves IT IS ANXIETY! as i have had a few things to worry about lately..... I have even become part of a reenactment group and have been out and about with that...... I cant go back to how i was before.... not movin from the floor....watchin tv.....scared to walk to the kitchen for fear of them..... no no no ...they are not grabbin me again!...off out today for a walk around the next little village wiv shops etc..... take care freinds...x