Thursday 26 February 2009

Right then wench...lets get a grip of things!


This is the quote I gave my self this morning!....... because.. Im still a nervous wreck...im still getting the palps...then no palps...panic... etc blah blah blah... but today I have been thinkin about the good things and I have found improvement...... You know me little electric bike that I have still not given you a peep of me on it yet...well these past couple of weeks I have overcome going places on me own on it.... I now can go down the st to the shops on me own as long as Im on me electric bike...... also today I went to the end of the village to the community house as I was helping prepare dinner for the biddies meal we do for them once a month...Well since Ive started there i have always got a lift! well today without even thinkin about it...I trotted/rode/floated there on me electric bike! ...no probs.... so the agoraphobia is going..... so the big question is this!...??? ...... why the bloody hell am i left with this fear of walkin????? every time i walk i feel so vunerable and my heart pounds and goes wonky and i feel like crap...i can walk about the house all day long.... but walk across the road and I struggle ....I feel I have a phobia of walkin ...goin back to that one day when i had that first horrid attack when riding me bike and excercising...its ever since that one day!...is this fear of excersing logged in my head which makes my heart go wonky because it went wonky that day or am I dyin!?.......................... I just wish I could pop along to the doctor but the thought makes me wanna crwl under the keys of this computer and hide away....talk about burying your head in the sand!..... HELLPPPP ME!!!!!! ....... any way to keep you going here is a piccy of a bike the same as mine.....x

3 comments:

Robert said...

I've been wondering how you are, so I'm very glad to see you putting up a new post. And it's good news, really, isn't it? Don't worry about the walking, it'll come.

Hope to hear more good news soon!

Rachel's Diary said...

hi there hun.... does marie have the same probs as me hun with the walking?..... did u notice my new site? u like? lol

Ruby said...

I can so understand the walking thing, if I have my car and can park less than 2 metres from where I need to go - I am fine. If I have to walk, or even the thought of walking, I am a total mess, can't do it!! Major panic starts instantly.

I would love to take my 2 dogs for a walk, but that hasn't happened for many years - lucky they are small and don't need the walk, but I am sure they would enjoy it :)