Been great!

hi guys...just thought I would pop in ....lol.... i wanted you to know im doing good! life has been great apart form being skint but hey we all are at the moment! I have started another blog as you know the therapy i had for the panic attacks that really worked... well I am having them now for eating and weight loss....I have joined slimming world and I am really looking for ward to loosing the weight as it has been a constant battle for a lot of years! and im really ready to loose the weight and the therapy has been working .... I have lost nearly a stone.... 6 more stone to go ... and i will be the complete new woman! Hope you are all well...and please please remember there is light at the end of the tunnell I promise you guys ... I am living evidence that there is.... x x x xlove u all
www.rachelwillbeslim.blogspot.com

wow i have been havin the best time for 4 years

hi guys, i just wanted you to know how i have been doing.... after my last blog...wooopps... bad language etc...well thats how i felt... i am feling alot better...great in fact... I can say that my Agoraphobia is on the back burner for now...it always sits there, I am cautious and lifes choices can be delicate but I did do the massive step a couple of weeks ago and ...well ....a few things really... I went to Wales to my Aunty's...then booked a holiday to the seaside at the end of August in a caravan...and went back to wales again, visited swansea and had a fab time... I was ok...this time 3 years ago i couldnt even see my self out the front gate ....but I ragged my self out of it.... i know how hard it is and I pray to God I neve get like that again ...but who can say as it is the second time in my life I have had the syptoms of Agoraphobia...... thanks you lot for your fantastic support and i hope you are all well.

I could seriously cry

Just woke up about half an hr ago to a run of ectopic/out of sync/irregular beats for about half an hr (just calmed down)......cannot believe these fucking things are back! yeah I am swearing...for the first time on my blog! I am SO pissed off...I ain't had any of these damn things since Jan and then they come....its like \i get rid of it and some evil bitch posts it back to me......... i don't mind the odd flutter through the day...that really don't bother me...... but when it gets into that rhythm of miss beat miss beat......you just think it will never ever go back..... i don't want this ...i want it to go .......... i will work on it peeps!....after what i have achieved this yr i cant let it get hold of me again!

BLOODY back again!!!!!

Hi peeps...... well I have been having an amazin time..... gettin out and about... to say I was agoraphobic a few months ago .. u would think I was lyin... I am also walkin more.... the palps did go...it was an amaziin feelin to feel normal and not worry about doin anything....but the other day they came back....but you know what .......truth.......and I think you will believe me you know.......I REALLY DONT CARE..... let them....for now i dont give a shiney shite ... let em happen....they will go ,,, i have had months and months with out them.... so im sure they will go again....it aint gonna stop me gettin out like before..... it just prooves IT IS ANXIETY! as i have had a few things to worry about lately..... I have even become part of a reenactment group and have been out and about with that...... I cant go back to how i was before.... not movin from the floor....watchin tv.....scared to walk to the kitchen for fear of them..... no no no ...they are not grabbin me again!...off out today for a walk around the next little village wiv shops etc..... take care freinds...x

Still doing well but a little hormonal!

Hi my lovelies..... just a quick update, I am feeling pretty normal!... still prone to the palps but nothing like they were....they are copable!...... where as before I coudnt cope at all.... makes you relaise how strange and amazing our bodies are.... but I do have a little theory...... I have seen a link.... If your a bloke shut your ears! lol.... HORMONES!!!!.... since Dec my cycle has gone haywire... missing periods and then bleeding for 4 weeks ..missing spotting! but since all this I have had less palps.... someone suggested i could be going through an early change or in peri menopause.... which im 100% sure of....one of the symptoms of peri menopause is palpatations...anxiety and panic attacks!!!!!! ohhhh heelllooooo!!!!! .... I really think it has had an effect!... so ladies...you may wanna think about that.... I am just praying they dont come back like they did.... . I still feel though that the agoraphobia has been a mental block with fear due to panicking whilst out...and I feel i have combatted that on my own . ,, so who knows eh! I am young to go through menopause but not to start peri...i was 38 the other day..(old git I know)... so i shall just have to see whats in store LOL...take care peeps ...speak soon x

livin proof you can kick it in the ass

You have followed me through thick n thin.... when i have woke in nights of flooded panic i have blogged.... days when i have not wanted to move or been to scared to go to the shop 3 doors away from my home!!! ...i have even had agoraphobia with in my own walls... scared to go from livin room to the kitchen...my space was becoming more and more limited... till in the end i knew i had to do something...i wanted to put it in order how i achieved this.

these are the things that affected me

1. couldnt be left on my own at all

2. couldnt leave the house

3.couldnt walk far with out feelin breathless or heart pounding

4.hated having visitors

5. had night panics every night so didn't sleep.

now....

1. love being on my own

2. Do everything i can to leave the house all the time ...love being out now

3. just started to walk a little now....do go to town and walk a little now

5. love having peeps round... been having lots of parties...body shop...ann summers etc

6. sleep like a baby

how have i achieved these things

1. started a little job ...avon so i had to get out and had to deliver goods as people were expecting me.

2. got freinds to take me in the car to places knowing i may have to turn back.

3. began to get involved in things within the community...i.e school....feeding the old folks at village hall....craft stalls....even though i was doing all this i was still having all the symptoms...but ploughed through

4. bought an electric bike to get my independance.

5. had people on standby when left on own knowing i had me bike there if i needed help.

6.put me self in vunerable situations but always got back up.

7. eat better... no processed food

8. drink plenty of water.

hope some of this helps! x x x x x x x x x

t

HEALING IS BEGINING

AFTER NEARLY 3 LONG YRS I SEE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL..... LIFE IS FEELING LESS WORRYING, BUT THE BEST BEST BEST NEWS OF ALL IS ......... THE PALPATATIONS ARE STOPPING,, THE PAST 6 DAYS I HAVE HAD THE SAME AMOUNT OF HEART FLUTTERS ETC AS I HAVE IN A COUPLE OF MINUTES....... I FEEL LIKE ITS BECOME REGULAR AGAIN................................ THE AMAZING THING IS.... IT WAS ANXIETY.... ANXIETY DID THIS TO MY BODY... BUT ITS AS IF IT HAD TO HAPPEN AND WORK ITS WAY OUT.... I KNOW I MAY EVEN GET THEM AGAIN.... I KNOW THAT BUT I HAVE TO TELL MYSELF...ITS JUST STRESS A SILLY THING THAT HAPPENS TO MY HEART.... BUT ITS NOTHING THAT WILL KILL ME.... IT WAS GETITNG TO THE POINT THAT IF I MOVED OR STOOD UP ETC THEY WOULD START... I HAVE BEEN DOIN A LITTLE BIT OF WALKING AND HAVE BEEN OK....PRAY FOR ME GUYS ...PRAY THAT THIS IS THE START OF RACHEL BEING BACK.... GOD HELP THE WORLD IF IT IS!.... I HAVE LEARNED ALOT FROM THIS EXPERIENCE...... ITS BEEN A PROPER PROPER JOURNEY... BUT THE KEY THING IS TO KEEP YOUR SELF BUSY AND MOTIVATED ... I HAVE DONE THE MOST DARING THINGS DURING MY BAD TIMES LIKE GETTING INVOLVED IN THE COMMUNITY AND ALSO NOT HIDING AWAY... MAKING ALLOWENCES FOR MY OWN FEARS AND HAVING FREINDS AROUND ME WHO CARE AND UNDERSTAND AND WHO ARE NOT SICK OF HEARING THE SAME OLD THING HAS BEEN HANDY AND HELPFULL. SO GUYS HANG ON IN THERE.... YOUR SYMPTOMS WILL EASE... I HAVE GONE FROM SITTING ON THE LIVING ROOM FLOOR WRAPPED IN BLANKETS AND WATCHING TV SCARED TO MOVE AND WHEN I DID HAVING A PANIC ATTACK TO GETTING OUT AND ABOUT WITH THE AID OF PEOPLE AND MY LECKY BIKE.....! ...OH YEAH ... YOU KNOW IT ALL STARTED WHEN I RODE TO MY MOTHERS AND HAD THAT MASSIVE ATTACK ON MY OWN...WELL THE OTHER DAY I RODE THE SAME JOURNEY... ON MY OWN BUT ON MY ELECTRIC BIKE.... IT WAS SOMOT I NEEEDED TO DO ... I DID IT.. I FELT NERVOUS A FEW TIMES AS ONE PART OF THE JOURNEY IS A 2 MILE LONG RD IN THE MIDDLE OF NO WHERE.... FEILDS EITHER SIDE..... BUT I DID IT.! BIKING IT WITHOUT ELECRTIC WOULD HAVE BEEN A DIFFERENT STORY LOL...BUT HEY WHO KNOWS MAYBE SOON ....X SPEAK SOON HUNNIES...... IF YOU WANNA ADD ME ON FACE BOOK SEARCH FOR RACHEL HUGHES WAS PARSONS WENCH AND YOU WILL FIND ME! TAKE CARE!!!!