livin proof you can kick it in the ass

You have followed me through thick n thin.... when i have woke in nights of flooded panic i have blogged.... days when i have not wanted to move or been to scared to go to the shop 3 doors away from my home!!! ...i have even had agoraphobia with in my own walls... scared to go from livin room to the kitchen...my space was becoming more and more limited... till in the end i knew i had to do something...i wanted to put it in order how i achieved this.

these are the things that affected me

1. couldnt be left on my own at all

2. couldnt leave the house

3.couldnt walk far with out feelin breathless or heart pounding

4.hated having visitors

5. had night panics every night so didn't sleep.

now....

1. love being on my own

2. Do everything i can to leave the house all the time ...love being out now

3. just started to walk a little now....do go to town and walk a little now

5. love having peeps round... been having lots of parties...body shop...ann summers etc

6. sleep like a baby

how have i achieved these things

1. started a little job ...avon so i had to get out and had to deliver goods as people were expecting me.

2. got freinds to take me in the car to places knowing i may have to turn back.

3. began to get involved in things within the community...i.e school....feeding the old folks at village hall....craft stalls....even though i was doing all this i was still having all the symptoms...but ploughed through

4. bought an electric bike to get my independance.

5. had people on standby when left on own knowing i had me bike there if i needed help.

6.put me self in vunerable situations but always got back up.

7. eat better... no processed food

8. drink plenty of water.

hope some of this helps! x x x x x x x x x

t

HEALING IS BEGINING

AFTER NEARLY 3 LONG YRS I SEE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL..... LIFE IS FEELING LESS WORRYING, BUT THE BEST BEST BEST NEWS OF ALL IS ......... THE PALPATATIONS ARE STOPPING,, THE PAST 6 DAYS I HAVE HAD THE SAME AMOUNT OF HEART FLUTTERS ETC AS I HAVE IN A COUPLE OF MINUTES....... I FEEL LIKE ITS BECOME REGULAR AGAIN................................ THE AMAZING THING IS.... IT WAS ANXIETY.... ANXIETY DID THIS TO MY BODY... BUT ITS AS IF IT HAD TO HAPPEN AND WORK ITS WAY OUT.... I KNOW I MAY EVEN GET THEM AGAIN.... I KNOW THAT BUT I HAVE TO TELL MYSELF...ITS JUST STRESS A SILLY THING THAT HAPPENS TO MY HEART.... BUT ITS NOTHING THAT WILL KILL ME.... IT WAS GETITNG TO THE POINT THAT IF I MOVED OR STOOD UP ETC THEY WOULD START... I HAVE BEEN DOIN A LITTLE BIT OF WALKING AND HAVE BEEN OK....PRAY FOR ME GUYS ...PRAY THAT THIS IS THE START OF RACHEL BEING BACK.... GOD HELP THE WORLD IF IT IS!.... I HAVE LEARNED ALOT FROM THIS EXPERIENCE...... ITS BEEN A PROPER PROPER JOURNEY... BUT THE KEY THING IS TO KEEP YOUR SELF BUSY AND MOTIVATED ... I HAVE DONE THE MOST DARING THINGS DURING MY BAD TIMES LIKE GETTING INVOLVED IN THE COMMUNITY AND ALSO NOT HIDING AWAY... MAKING ALLOWENCES FOR MY OWN FEARS AND HAVING FREINDS AROUND ME WHO CARE AND UNDERSTAND AND WHO ARE NOT SICK OF HEARING THE SAME OLD THING HAS BEEN HANDY AND HELPFULL. SO GUYS HANG ON IN THERE.... YOUR SYMPTOMS WILL EASE... I HAVE GONE FROM SITTING ON THE LIVING ROOM FLOOR WRAPPED IN BLANKETS AND WATCHING TV SCARED TO MOVE AND WHEN I DID HAVING A PANIC ATTACK TO GETTING OUT AND ABOUT WITH THE AID OF PEOPLE AND MY LECKY BIKE.....! ...OH YEAH ... YOU KNOW IT ALL STARTED WHEN I RODE TO MY MOTHERS AND HAD THAT MASSIVE ATTACK ON MY OWN...WELL THE OTHER DAY I RODE THE SAME JOURNEY... ON MY OWN BUT ON MY ELECTRIC BIKE.... IT WAS SOMOT I NEEEDED TO DO ... I DID IT.. I FELT NERVOUS A FEW TIMES AS ONE PART OF THE JOURNEY IS A 2 MILE LONG RD IN THE MIDDLE OF NO WHERE.... FEILDS EITHER SIDE..... BUT I DID IT.! BIKING IT WITHOUT ELECRTIC WOULD HAVE BEEN A DIFFERENT STORY LOL...BUT HEY WHO KNOWS MAYBE SOON ....X SPEAK SOON HUNNIES...... IF YOU WANNA ADD ME ON FACE BOOK SEARCH FOR RACHEL HUGHES WAS PARSONS WENCH AND YOU WILL FIND ME! TAKE CARE!!!!