Sunday 19 October 2008

big changes






Hi guys, I have had an amazing time lately, mixed feelings and a slight positivness that has come out of the blue. Basicaly me and Paul have been going through a rough patch as Paul also suffers from anxiety and also severe depression...it was revealed to me that my illness is affecting him and he is finding it hard to cope..blah blah blah!! like his dont me !!!!! Any way... the last few weeks I have took myself and shook my self and these are the things I have said...



Rachel wherever you are and whatever you do in this short life we have here on earth these symptoms will happen ...BUT...if you try to get on with things and take the symtoms with you and do something active then hopefuly they will dissapear..or I can keep in the house wondering how long Paul is gonna be and quivering because I am on me own and do nothing with my life at all!!!! So.... I decided to do some thing active but do it in my own village, so I have becaome a Parish counseller, a member of the tennants and resisdents association.... im starting a neighbour hood watch, ....getting involved in the community center, im doing christmas dinners for the old bids, activities up at school , i will have my own stall at the christmas fairs ( all 3 of them ) .... and I started a craft course last wed, will be doing that every wed in the wk...... Im still getting the palps but feeling more positive,,, lib was 17 the other day (13th) and me little baby wanted us to go out for a meal, so I did and I loved it...the day after I went and walked about 1/4 of a mile to my freinds house...with out the bike.... I went to town and did some clothes shopping, I have done all this in one wk.... I have pushed myself... and coped...so please say A prayer for me this week that some of these horrid symptoms start to dissapear whilst I get my head busy again!!! the photos are from libs dinner x x x x



3 comments:

coffeecup said...

When I read this I was jumping for joy! Way to go Rachel! That inner strength has always shone through no matter how tough things have been, and here you proving that you are a true fighter. You'll never be a victim to anxiety, and I believe you will beat it completely with that constructive attitude of yours. When things get really shitty, this is the real test of character, either you can quit or make the changes necessary to have a happier life. I'm inspired. Well done and a huge hug from me!
XXXX

diver said...

Great stuff Rachel, what you said: "... if you try to get on with things and take the symptoms with you and do something active then hopefuly they will disappear" - just brilliant ! I'm looking forward to hearing how your experiment goes. Cheers!

Rachel's Diary said...

oh bless you both thank you so much xxxx