So important to try and take each day as it comes... something I am trying to teach myself..so hard when things are tough but really easy when things are ok! Well today I went to me ma's as she ain't well at all... Libby came with me as she is still off it... cleaned upstairs for me mum and dad...did a real good job for her...as I was cleaning I thought I wish I could do this more for her.. be here for her more & then to make things worse when we were in the kitchen she grabbed my arm and looked at me and cried an little whilst saying...." I miss you Rachel"... God it nearly tore out my heart.... I said "Mum i know... i just ain't been well" ... the words resounded in my own ears...here's my Mother with a bad heart, lungs really bad and taking each day to the limit and enjoying it and I cant come over to see her unless I get a lift cos I cant use the public transport and walk half a mile on my own to see her.....WHAT A BLOODY FAILURE! I just want her to understand but I suppose she ever will ... not her fault...just that's the way it is! My mum is such a strong character.. not much fazes her at all...good soul and a good woman. I love her so much and Dad of course but I am having a mummy moment (LOL)
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It just puts everything into perspective when your parents do things like that, and it really pulls at your heart strings! i get the same when i go see my mum! i come away feeling guilty a lot of the time. xx
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